mood: indescribable

music: yeah yeah yeahs - down boy
the hush sound - don't wake me up

frou frou - hear me out

frou frou - let go
okkervil river - a girl in port
gregory and the hawk - in fact
regina spektor - somedays
modest mouse - bankrupt on selling

There's a lot that needs to be said. Let's start off with Amani. I never want to get with her. She irritates me. I have a few other girls in mind. Girls who respect me more. I'll be single until next semester though. I don't want to jump into any relationship just yet. I don't want to be uncertain and end up hurting an innocent girl. They say you can sleep knowing that people suffer but you can never sleep knowing you made people suffer.

I can't travel this summer. I forgot all about Fahima coming to visit. I wouldn't miss that for the world. I feel bad for Akhi. Lucas dumped her and now she has the same fate as her sister. How can I save everyone? If I'm not the hero, then who is? I hope someday I'll have what it takes to not let anyone down. To catch those who fall.

Changing the subject to marriage. I was talking to someone and I won't mention who it is but I kinda sorta made her want to marry me. So I was like, there are other people out there like me. It doesn't have to be me who marries you. I like the girl a bit but I'm not going to think about marrying anyone just yet.

Last but not least, money. Imagine not having a cent after college and me having to stay here in this godforsaken place another year or so. I need to save up. Dreams don't come cheap.